Two in There!

bring on the stupendously big pants
March 26, 2009, 4:57 pm
Filed under: babies

Elasticated waists are my friend. I knew I’d show quickly this time, given that my once svelte young body has already swollen to frankly alien proportions, during the joyous epoch that was my first pregnancy. What I didn’t bank on, however, was that not only would I be housing one lodger, battling with my innards for legroom, beanie brought a friend along for moral support. My poor babies have been down-graded from the roomy offerings of business class, to the borderline sardine-tin parameters of a budget carrier. And my babies will be particularly leggy, with Dave towering just shy of 6″7 and myself an easy 5″9, with a combined leg length of 280 inches, these babies are pre-destined for greatness. In a height sense, anyway.

If I’m perfectly honest, it’s a little worrying. I’ve found myself agog, in front of the bedroom mirror in all my naked pregnant glory, poking and prodding at my already rounding tum and wondering how on earth are they both going to fit?! I know pregnancy involves a bit of a reshuffle of the old interior architecture, but surely this is going to require a renovation Kevin McCloud would be proud of.

Oh, and being a fan of posh undies has gone out the window. The satin Fauve numbers have been tossed aside in favour of the enormous, greying granny-efforts usually reserved for darkest, hairy-legged ladyweek moments. They’re now fitting like the unforgiving second-skin of latex bondagewear, and providing great comfort under my far-from-sexy stretch denim. I’ve already shelved the skinnies for the comfort of elasticated belly-huggers, and oh what happiness they are to a bladder that’s filling up like my Aunt Jeanie’s wine glass at an open bar.

I know this time if I want my figure back, I’ll need to hook up with Doc Brown, fiddle with the flux-capacitor and pay a visit to 2006 where I left it. But it’s all good, and if it’s in the name of healthy babies, bring on the belly! And the cake.


Siobhan xxx


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